This is a topic one cannot skip discussing about. But we never discuss it. Though we are not in a culture to discuss it openly with family members, it is high time to give a thought about this as we see there is a number of sexual harassment and incidents happening in various parts of our nation. I feel this is an important topic as Living together is emerging trend among younger generation these days. Let’s discuss about whether it is a Yes or No to Pre-Marital sex.
Pre-marital sex is sexual activity practiced by persons who are unmarried. Historically considered taboo (something which is prohibited or restricted by social custom) in many cultures and considered a sin in numerous religions, it has become more commonly accepted in developed countries in the last few decades. In the world view, “Is it OK to have premarital sex?” That is a common question among teens and engaged couples. Perhaps you are in a relationship that is progressing in that direction, but you’re not sure what to do. In your mind, you are probably weighing the pros and cons of premarital sex.
On the positive side of the scale, there is acceptance from your peers, hope for pleasure, and the fulfillment of sexual desires. The negative side of the scale carries the weights of morals, fear of pregnancy or disease, and guilt. How do these scales balance? What is the right decision?
These are some facts which need to be answered before taking the scale further. In the moral view, Morality is a factor for many people when deciding whether or not to have premarital sex. Is it a factor for you? After all, the messages we receive from most TV shows and movies these days tells us “everyone is doing it.” In light of today’s permissive attitude, your peers may think you’re weird to even question it. But maybe there is something inside you, like a voice in your head which is making you uncertain about whether or not sex before marriage is a right or wrong action. Many people refer to this voice as their conscience.
How can you know if your “conscience” is right? People all around the world look to different holy epics corresponding to their religion as a moral, some epics describe premarital sex as fornication. That’s a word we don’t hear much these days, so what does it mean?
Fornication is sexual intercourse between people who are not married to each other. Another consideration when deciding about premarital sex is safety. As per the latest statistics, 50% of the people who currently have HIV are between the ages of 15 and 24. Using a condom only reduces the risk of contracting HIV by 85%. Condoms do not significantly reduce the risk of contracting other sexually transmitted diseases. Most people don’t consider the emotional effects of premarital sex. You see, sex is an emotional experience and it affects our lives in ways we don’t understand. After engaging in premarital sex, many people express feelings of guilt, embarrassment, distrust, resentment, lack of respect, tension, and so much more.
Imagine, for a moment, a world without premarital sex. There would be no sexually-transmitted diseases, there would be no un-wed mothers, there would be no unwanted pregnancies, there would be no abortions.
In discussing premarital sex, we often focus on the “recreation” aspect of it. Yes, sex is pleasurable. God, our Creator, designed it that way. It may be hard to think of God creating sex, but He did! In God’s plan, sex was designed for married couples to enjoy the pleasure and excitement of sexual relations. Why is this? Yes, sex is pleasurable, but in God’s view, the primary purpose of sex is not recreation, but rather re-creation. In other words, sex is for reproduction. God does not limit sex to married couples to rob pleasure from those who are unmarried. Rather, God commands
against premarital sex in order to protect unmarried people from unwanted pregnancies, from children born to parents who do not want them, and to protect children from parents who are not prepared for them. Imagine, for a moment, a world without premarital sex. There would be no sexually-transmitted diseases, there would be no un-wed mothers, there would be no unwanted pregnancies, there would be no abortions.
A frequent question in relation to premarital sex is, “If we can’t have sex, how far can we go?” A better question would be “How far should we go?” God’s Word does not give us a detailed “list” of things a couple should or shouldn’t do before they are married. Some use this as an excuse to “push the envelope” as close to premarital sex as possible. So, if sexual activity and all forms of foreplay should be restricted to married couples, what can a pre-married couple do? This is to some degree up to the couple and their own relationship. It is generally recommended that a couple not go past holding hands, hugging, and light kissing before marriage. The more a married couple has to share exclusively between themselves, the more special and unique the sexual relationship becomes.
As a cultural view, the cultural acceptability of premarital sex varies between cultures and time periods. Western cultures have traditionally been disapproving of it, on occasions forbidding it. On the contrary, premarital sex has no moral grounds, it is against God, and it is unsafe physically and emotionally. Although sex is pleasurable, it is designed by God to be enjoyed by two married people to live happily ever after if they are destined to.
This post is written for YES or NO to Pre-Marital Sex contest sponsored by Poonaam Uppal’s True Love – A Mystical True Love Story on Flipkart. & hosted by .